Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk
by lottawoman
Summary: Bella Swan is an aspiring singer/songwriter living just outside the limits of Forks Washington. Edward Cullen is just drifting by when he finds a reason to stick around.
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own any of these characters, they are the product of the very fantastic imagination of Stephanie Meyers, creator of Twilight. I'm just boring until this story ends.**

**Please review and enjoy (hopefully). If you are a Beta Reader, take pity on me and HELP. I know I suck at the punctuation and first/second/past/present thing.**

**Thanks! Enjoy!**

Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk

Chapter One:

I sighed leaning back against the hard café chair staring out the window with blind interest, tapping my foot out of my sandal letting my toes rub gloriously on the cool marble tiled floor. Letting out a long sigh as I tapped my pencil to the rhythm in my head, and closed my eyes _Maybe I can see it…c'mon._ It happened like that sometimes, I could see the lyrics scroll across the blackness of my closed lids, poetry floating in waves, satisfying the swollen lump in my throat every time I was blocked. _Please…please, I need this._

I waited, my toes curling then tracing the concrete line between the tile in anticipation of the moment the words would come. And they are coming, they always do; ever since I was a little girl strumming angry toneless chords from my fathers favorite guitar on the back porch steps. _She'll never love you the way I can, you'll see, she'll break your heart 'way you broke mine and I hope you die…_Now, mind you I was nine years old and Terence Campbell asked me to be his girlfriend after kissing me under the monkey bars before lunch. Then took it back after I laughed hard enough to snort milk from my nose and over his tray during lunch. By dismissal he was holding hands with Erica Beatty and my life was over.

Taking another deep breath I let it out slow my head drifting gently to the side muting the sounds around me. Quieting the long dismissed memories of stupid head Terence Campbell and his intolerance for lactaidinal emissions, the jingle of customers entering and exiting the café and the dull hum of life outside the cool storefront glass I was now leaning on, _Please, I know you're there, just…_the corners of my mouth turned slowly up, the ache in my throat rejoiced as my fingers spread wide on the table, straightening the paper in front of me then reaching for my pencil. My hand went to work an obedient servant, scribbling the words as they stenciled into the blackness and I smiled more…it was perfect.

_Summer rain, dripping down your face again  
Summer rain, praying someone feels the same  
Take the pain killer, cycle on your bicycle  
Leave all this misery behind_

Light pierced the darkness, my lashes untangled with the effort and I was offended by the synapses firing in my brain telling my eyes to commit such a heinous crime. I rubbed the offense away and squinted down at the paper now decorated in my scribbled handwriting, it was like reading hieroglyphics sometimes. Not this time though, the lyrics were clear and they were good, I nodded responding to the conversation in my head. Biting my lip I continued, words and melodies streaming in like an _endless band of ribbon uncoiling from the Gods right into my consciousness_. I giggled at that and wrote the line in the margin of the paper, shaking my head at how silly this process was sometimes. My toes danced happily on the floor, lifting and twirling the sandal in a not so graceful waltz.

_My love giving me head, feeling very guilty, breaking the bread  
Losing my attention, I'm taking the world on  
So batten up the hatches, here comes the cold  
I can feel it creeping, and it's making me old  
You give me so much love that it blows my brains out_

I wrote until letters and notes waned gently into silence and when I was done, I was exhausted but so very satisfied. Raking my fingers through my hair, my hand massaged as it trailed down along the curve of my neck, dropping my head forward with a low groan as the world became animated again. I was suddenly aware of table number five needing a refill on their coffee and table two's order was finally up, Salmon and asparagus burger on toasted bagel.

"Bella! Let's go baby you're break is over, Angela's getting swamped over here!" Rubbing my eyes once more I tucked the pencil behind my ear, quickly folding the paper and stuffing it in the pocket of my apron as I stood up, shuffling my foot back into my sandal.

"I'm coming, I'm coming! Gosh I just sat down Harry give a girl a break!" He chuckled, shaking his head as he turned back to the grill calling over his shoulder "Yeah well you keep talking to yourself scaring my customers away you're going to be on a permanent break missy." I could hear the teasing smirk in his tone and I ignored it, I always did, shaking my head as I answered the response in my head _I do not talk to myself. _I grabbed the fresh pot of decaf and table two's order from the counter before Harry could summon me with his harmless bark. Spinning around I nearly collided with Angela, she laughed as she ducked, stuffing her tips into her pocket.

"Um, yes you do…all the time Bella." I blinked then stared at her wondering how she could hear my thoughts, my brows knitting together for a brief moment before I shrugged and kept moving, the guy at table two looking like he's ready to lunge at me for his burger. I smile at him, stammering softly over my words and I lay his food out for him "I'm sorry about the wait, we're a little crowded at lunch time." He didn't respond and I was grateful, I warmed his coffee after offering him another apologetic smile then moved on, glancing around at all my tables, doing a mental checklist for each.

_Table one, needs ketchup, looks like table three's almost ready for their check. _I pulled my tablet from my pocket and the pencil from behind my ear as I made my way to table five, not bothering to look as I filled the coffee cup "Okay, just let me know if you need anything else." It was my autopilot response to customers, as long as I smiled and appeared sincere, they never really cared. I was about to shuffle away, my mind preoccupied with the adding and subtracting of table three's bill. "Uhhh, I could use a towel? Maybe?"

My nose wrinkled in response, "Huh?" then my eyes widened a mortified gasp filled my lungs as I fumbled and stuttered "Oh my God…I spilled the…I'm so" shaking my head, circling aimlessly trying to figure out how not to burn myself with the coffee I was still holding. Angela laughed coming to my rescue "God Bella, gimme that." She carefully took the handle and flung the towel from her apron string over my shoulder. I snatched it down, immediately stumbling over to him, wiping faster than the towel could absorbed the heated liquid. His face twisted as he hissed a flood of coffee rushing like a waterfall over the edge of the table and onto his lap. "Fuck…that's….hot."

My mouth gapped open, I just couldn't believe what was happening, I'm an idiot…_What the hell is wrong with you!_

"I'm sorry…its just…really hot." He laughed as he apologized and started to slide from the booth, swiping his hands down over his now very stained khaki pants. I shook my head, eyes wide, mouth opened…no words. "No…not…" I shook my head again and wished silently for a set of jumper cables. I needed a jolt. I was frozen and for the time being he seemed to be caught in the same cosmic space time continuum as me, because he just stared with a strange, breathtakingly adorable, embarrassed smile on his face.

"Umm…" his brows arched and he extended his hand toward me, I smiled awkward and moved closer to him wringing the damp warm towel in my hands. Pressing his lips together he laughed, tilting his head silently asking me a question. I had no idea, so I tilted my head in response, wrinkling my nose again. "What?" he grinned wide and cleared his throat, nodding toward the towel in my hand. It took me a moment and when the light bulb went on, I groaned. _Idiot!_

He arched his brows and laughed tugging the towel gently from my hand. I said that out loud. _Oh crap I said that out loud? _He laughed more, already busy cleaning himself off, he shook his head a playful glint in his eyes as he looked up again tossing the towel on the table.

"Its okay, I've been called worse."

"No…I didn't mean. I wasn't, I was talking to…myself. In my head." His brows arched again, twisting his lips clearly trying very hard not to humiliate me even more with laughter. "You mean you were thinking?" I offered a firm nod, that was it.

"Yes…I was thinking, out loud, to myself." I took a deep breath and gave up, I wasn't making any sense…done trying.

He grinned wide, turning to the table he started to clean it off with the towel there, looking over his shoulder at me as he worked absently. Folding the towel to the good side he leaned down and wiped the booth seat clean, folding again giving it another once over before turning back to me. "You do that a lot?"

I snorted, shaking my head taking the towel from him, wondering if I should look for Ashton Kutcher or something. "Um, no…I've never done that before. I'm so sorry, I don't know why I didn't look first. Or ask if you wanted more coffee. It was stupid, I don't know what's wrong with me today. I've never poured coffee on a customer before. I can take care of the dry cleaning, I work here so you know, you can just leave the bill with Harry or something if I'm not here." I sighed tossing the towel on the counter, looking the table, booth and floor over making sure there wasn't more for me to do.

"No, I meant…do you, think out loud to yourself…a lot."

"Oh! Oh…" I frowned, already nodding my answer. "Apparently."

He laughed at that, ducking his head down his eyes squinted as he read my name tag. "Well…Bella. It's been a pleasure listening to you think out loud…to yourself. Well…" he hesitated his smile turning to a tease as he pulled his wallet from his back pocket. "minus the scorched groin and everything." I couldn't help my lips from pulling at the corners, my laughter barely held at bay. _Coffee burns on my nut sack, sounds like a rap song. Wait…_I squinted at him to see if he could hear that, touching my lips for a little extra insurance that they weren't moving and they weren't. _Okay, good. _

He smirked as he pulled bills from his wallet, tossing them on the table, shaking his head.

"You're doing it again."

I squeaked.

He laughed, running his fingers gently through his hair as he made his way past me tucking his wallet back into his pocket. I turned toward him, stammering my cheeks so hot I could feel beads of sweat lifting to the surface of my skin.

"No, I'm just…I was thi." He cut me off with a laugh; his hand paused on the handle of the café door.

"I know, I know thinking out loud, to yourself. You should try and talk to people sometimes. I hear it's all the rage."

I blushed more, not trusting my crazy brain or my incompetent mouth anymore. Staring worked, dumb, silent, staring. I could hear his laughter over the jingle of the bell as he opened the door, I closed my eyes and I swore I could hear his laughter as he made his way up the street.

"BELLA!"

I jumped, not sure how long I'd been standing there with my eyes closed concentrating on the sound of laughter that I knew was too far away to actually hear. Harry was glaring at me, waving his greasy spatula around toward the room filled with filled tables.

"Customers? You do still work here right?"

"Right…sorry Harry."


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own these characters, Stephanie Meyers does, I'm just borrowing them until this story ends. Enjoy, please review, all are welcomed. Well, not the mean ones, I can accept criticism as long as its constructive. Thanks All.**

Chapter Two

Laughter spilled from the back room, our make shift employee lounge, which consisted of three milk crates, a shipping palate and a daily opened box of Mountain Dew, all arranged neatly in the corner of the store room. It was 1am and I was exhausted, I cracked my back as I reached behind me pulling the apron strings loose and folding it over my arm, my feet literally dragging the floor. I heard the laughter die down and smiled as Angela leaned back on her crate to make sure the shuffling sound was me and not Harry.

"It's just me…but I can smell the smoke so you might wanna open the back door Ang." She rolled her eyes, snapping her cell phone shut, giving a very brave dismissive wave as she got up taking another drag from her cigarette.

"Screw him," she blew the smoke toward the ceiling vent, waving her hand absently over her head making the smoke swirl and dance above her. "If he gave us cigarette breaks like every other decent, kind employer, I wouldn't be breaking his damn rules." I laughed as I approached her, taking the cigarette between my fingers, nodding as I put it to my lips, pulling from it, every nerve ending in my body grateful for the fix. I closed my eyes letting the tar and every other unholy chemical burn my lungs and sighed releasing the white filtered air as I handed it back to her.

"Nicotine…it is a bitch." Grinning as I opened my eyes, already anticipating the eye roll she would give me, I walked toward the store room door, cracking it a bit the fresh, crisp air wafting in ushering some of the smoke away. I pulled the rubber band from my hair, rubbing my fingers on my scalp with a groan, my hair spilling over my shoulders as I stood in front of the mirror tapped to the far wall of our little lounge. Pulling my name tag off and pinning it to apron for safe keeping I started to hum the melody that had been on repeat in my head for the past few days.

Preoccupied, I always was when a melody wouldn't leave me alone; I never even heard Angie approach but I smiled as she ran her fingers through my hair gently tugging the ends into a loose braid. She always did that at the end of the day, I think she just hated that I never took much interest in girlie, dainty things like combing my hair more than once a day. I smiled at her in the mirror a silent thank you for the gesture and she chuckled low in response.

"You heading to Deluca's." She knew me so well asking a question she already knew the answer to, but I nodded anyway. "Mmhmm, Jake gave me the 2am spot." I turned her wrist up looking at the time. "Shit I should get going; I still have some work to do on the song."

Pulling her own apron off, she sat on her crate changing her shoes, sifting through her bag for the things she used every night before she left work, brush, make-up, cigarette lighter. "I might head over there with you tonight Bella, its been a while since I've seen Jake with his fine self." I laughed, arching a brow as I shrugged into my jacket "Yeah um, then clearly it's been a while since you've seen Leah too? So long that you forgot she exists?" Laughing more when she huffed, running the brush quickly through her hair, I loved Angela; she was so comfortable being herself that it was difficult not to envy her confidence at times. "Bella, that bitch is on her way out…." She trotted over to the mirror, lipstick in hand making me laugh as she tried to talk as she put some on, sounding like the 'wah wah' of an grown up on a Charlie Brown cartoon. I managed to understand the parts that mattered, Jake was a trapped man…she had the key, blah blah blah. We'd had this conversation before, many times in fact and as usual Angela was completely delusional about her feminine wilds and their effect on one Jacob Black. I grabbed by bag, shaking my head at her as I slipped it onto my shoulder, leaning against the door frame I waited knowing she needed a ride.

"Never mind they've been together nearly three years huh." She nodded dusting a little something on her face, whatever it was I couldn't see the difference it made, but who am I to say anything. "Exactly…never mind."

Angie could always make me laugh; we'd been friends since high school, classic story. I was new, shy, smart, artsy kid that no one ever talked to, she was the popular loud mouth that everyone wanted to be around. Girl needs friend, other girl needs to pass calculus, one tutoring and make over session later we were best friends for life. Not that I couldn't make friends on my own, I could and did. But being friends with Angela made my move to Forks Washington so much easier that I'd anticipated it would be. She got me; before anyone else did and once she was able to translate my extremely awkward stammering, nervous ticks and inability to walk and do just about anything at the same time for the masses; life at Forks High was gravy.

I smiled at the memory, shaking my head at her as she maneuvered her breasts so there was a little more cleavage than God had actually provided. She was really planning on prowling tonight "Are you ready Ang, I've got just about 20 minutes to get over there." She blew out a dismissive breath, still checking herself out, tugging her skirt just a bit lower. "Oh please, you've got a date with a hard bar stool and a microphone that has some serious audio feedback issues." Shoving my hands in my pocket, I pouted _Now that's not fair, the stool has a cushion. _She laughed, shaking her head as she slipped into her jean jacket, flinging her bag over her shoulder "Yeah, a torn one that cuts into your ass when you're up there too long."

I frowned getting out my keys and opening the door as she called over her shoulder to Harry that we were leaving. His response was his typical rant about slamming the storeroom door so it locks and letting us know he could smell cigarette smoke up front. We laughed the alley echoing as she gave the door a good slam. "Speaking of hot men…" I paused my key in the door, looking over the roof of the car at her wondering who was speaking of hot men. I often missed entire portions of a conversation so I didn't say anything; I figured I'd piece it together like I always do. She seemed to be reading my mind again and rolled her eyes opening her door once she heard the lock snap up.

Getting inside, I turned the car on and she immediately pressed the eject on my CD player, not even bothering to see if it was something she would like. Like I said, she knew me well and to say our taste in music was different is a complete understatement. Flipping through the stations she found one she like and I was completely disgusted by, tugging my seatbelt into place before pulling the car into gear I drove out of alley and onto the street, flipping the heat on. "So, the coffee crotch guy…he was gorgeous!" I had no idea what she was talking about, holding my strumming hand in front of the vent I arched a brow at her, letting my non response clue her in on my ignorance. She laughed and shook her head, looking up at the ceiling of the car like it would have the answer to why I was so dense sometimes. "Gorgeous, piercing green eyes, bronze just been fucked hair, tall…cherry red lip, crooked smile? Any of this ring a bell?" I stared at the road, shrugging a little as I worked the kinks out of my fingers in the warm heat. "Oh good lord Bella! You assault many men today with a pot of hot coffee?"

The bell began ringing as I realized who she was talking about. Right, hot guy, hot crotch, I'm an idiot. "Right, yeah…I was so freakin embarrassed I don't even think I paid much attention to what he looked like." _Liar. _

She laughed "You are such a liar. You were totally checking him out!" I looked at her, my mouth open and she smirked as I started to stutter. "I…no I wasn't…he, I was just…" Laughing more she waved her hand as if she was trying to help by pulling the words from me, but, there was no help, I didn't even know what the hell I was saying.

"Don't even bother to deny it. You were all…" her voice went all Betty Boop on me as she arched her back emphasizing her breasts and I groaned, turning the corner. "Oh…excuse me _Mr. Hawt Coffee Crotch Guy _let me clean that up for you. Can I take your number…I mean oops your order?" I so hate her sometimes. "I…did not do that Ang." I laughed, completely mortified as the memory of this afternoons events that even now nearly 13 hours later made me want to die came flooding back in. "You so did! You were all _let me clean that up for you…lo-ver._" She was having too much fun and when she was like this denial was completely moot. There is a button in my head that is reserved for moments just like this, so I pressed it and like magic this silly, wonderful completely slutty best friend of mine was put on mute and I smiled.

I scanned the block for a parking space, checking the clock; _great I've got five minutes_. I perked up when a car at the end of the block pulled out, rushing toward it I back in and sighed as I turned off the car _three minutes to spare_. Looking over at Angela who hugging herself and smooching the air with her eyes closed, I arched my brow as she parted her fingers into a V in front of her mouth her tongue lashing and flicking between them. _What the hell?_ Right…mute. _Must remember to turn it off or she just looks crazy sometimes._ I regretted that decision the moment she was in full volume again.

"_Oh yeah Coffee Crotch! Stick it right there, just how I like it!" _She saw the look on my face which I could only imagine was a cross between complete confusion and absolute horror and burst into laughter. Shaking my head as I opened my door and popped the trunk, I laughed, rounding the car as she poured herself from the passenger side laughing even more. "You know you liked him."

I shrugged, smoothing my hand over my guitar case before lifting it out and closing the trunk. "What's not to like…he was…beautiful and aloof. Funny, charming." I continued as she opened the front door to Deluca's a place I easily considered my home away from home most nights of the week. "He cleaned the table off…did you see that? I was just…" taking in a deep breath as I trailed off, the familiar smell of old pine and beer filling my senses, comforting me as I made my way to the back. Angela followed behind me, I was faintly aware that she was greeting people and undoubtedly not paying any attention to what I was saying. Perfect, because I didn't think I could stop. "He was…wow. His eyes were amazing; I don't think I've ever seen that color green before on…anything. And I mean, if there's one color we know in Forks, its green right?"

Not expecting an answer I laughed at myself, because she definitely wasn't listening, Jake was rounding the bar and approaching us with a welcoming, very Jake trademark grin. I set my case on the floor as he opened his arms pulling me into a tight hug. He greeted everyone like they were a long lost friend, didn't matter that he saw me practically every night for the past year. The hugs were always tight and yup, he lifted me like a feather off the floor laughing as I protested and swatted his back for release.

"You all ready Bells, the schmuck up there is eating into your time so you better get up there." He eased pass me reaching for Angela who let out an obnoxiously loud moan as he hugged her, the sound of it was immediately eclipsed by the brooding, melodic sound coming from the dimly lit stage. It pulled me closer, as if each note stretched out into tiny fingers luring my body, my soul toward the stage and I stood there gazing up. This must be what a siren song is, _Irresistible. _I watched as his lips curled around each low, practically groaned word and my heart sang. A song so yearning that I had to place my hand on my chest to make sure it didn't leap forward and I would understand if it did. I wanted to be closer too, my fingers tightened around the handle of my guitar case to keep from reaching out and touching some part, some connection to the sweet torturous sound of his voice.

In the distance I was aware that she was behind me, Angela leaned in closer, silent for a moment then in a voice I don't think I'd ever heard from her, she spoke softly not wanting to disrupt the air with her own voice as it mingled with his.

"Wow, Coffee Crotch Guy…"


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:**

**I feel it necessary to say that none of these characters are mine, they all belong to Stephanie Meyers the creator of Twilight. I am not that talented so even the song lyrics in this chapter (and likely all other chapters) belong to others. The song is called Star Mile by Joshua Radin, feel free to check him out.**

**Oh and, if you are so inclined, please review, good or bad, it all helps. I am looking for a Beta Reader as well. Thanks Enjoy!**

Chapter Three

I watched as his fingers slipped over the strings of the guitar, the last notes of his song vibrating to a slow, soulful end and I actually sighed. Full on, fan girl, throw your panties on the stage sigh and I wasn't even ashamed. He opened his eyes as his audience whooped and clapped; grinning in appreciation he let out a boyish laugh as he stood slipping the guitar strap over his head.

I was still standing there as he said his thank you's, walking toward the edge of the stage he noticed me, smiling wide as he kneeled down. His smile was like a magnet and I leaned closer to him making him chuckle "Well look who's here; you're not following me are you?" I was at a loss for words _You're beautiful. _Hopping off the stage he laughed as Angela slapped my shoulder and once again I was mortified placing my hand over my mouth squeezing my lips tight, it was the only way I could make sure they didn't do something stupid.

He arched a brow, still chucking "Thank you?" I saw him glance at Angela as if to ask the question that I always asked myself and never really knew the answer to _is she okay?_

I cleared my throat running my hand nervously through my hair as he walked closer holding his guitar by the neck "Um, I'm…I'm sorry, I was…I mean, _that _was beautiful. The song?" he laughed and I knew I didn't have to say anymore "That thinking out loud thing is dangerous huh." Another groan, I was so thankful when Jake walked up behind him patting his back "Nice set man, what's your name again?" _Yes, what's your name, Coffee Crotch Guy just doesn't fit… Are you still holding your lips? _I pulled a little just to make sure _Okay good. _He was still looking at me, his eyes, even in the dim light of the bar dazzled a brilliant emerald green pulling me the tiniest of steps closer to him. Angela held my arm talking through her teeth so her lips wouldn't move she sang "You're mummbliiiing."

I squeaked, shaking my head at myself, I raked my hand over my face to clear the cobwebs and decided I needed a distraction. "Um Jake, I'm gonna…" I gestured toward the stage already sliding my guitar case across the smooth surface silently berating myself for my new inability to finish even the simplest of sentences. Ascending the steps I felt his long fingers gently slip around my forearm then slide back to my elbow he held me in place as he spoke softly, leaning in "Wait a second, " I was afraid to look, the fan girl boldness had all but disappeared and only I remained. Shy, stumbling Bella, biting my lip I turned my head slightly and made some involuntary sound that he took for an invitation to whisper quietly in my ear "It's Edward, my name is Edward. You're Bella Swan right?" I looked at him fully now, my surprise evident, nodding I mumbled another incomplete thought "Yeah, how did you…"

He smiled, letting me go he leaned his guitar against the edge of the stage and slipped his hands into his pockets "I hope you don't mind, I asked around. I mean…after this morning…I just…" He was embarrassed. Was he embarrassed? The possibility of it made me grin so ridiculously wide that my cheeks burned with the effort. "No, no its okay I just…I was so embarrassed about that…the coffee thing. I can't tell you how sorry I am." He interrupted and I watched as his cheeks flushed the slighted hue of pink as he combed his fingers back through his hair then looked up at me as he protested. "Don't be, I should have said something, but you looked so busy and I _did _want my coffee warmed a bit. It was my fault…besides, I should be thanking you." I wrinkled my nose letting him know that needed an explanation, the grin I found so alluring morphed into something I could only describe as electric. The voltage ebbed slowly through body making my toes curl and I cleared my throat again.

"I hated those pants. And, it has so far been my most interesting afternoons in a really long time." He smiled, waiting for me to respond and I just couldn't, instead I traced the bold lines of his face and lips with my eyes, letting them roam down over his strong chin to the long curve of his neck. His Adams apple bobbed beneath his pale skin and I was faintly aware that he was saying something else; his touch forced me to tune back in.

"You're offended, I'm sorry I didn't mean to over step. I just…I was thinking about you after I left the café and I was pretty sure you were a local so, I asked a few people." _He was thinking about me? _The charming low bravado of his voice was replaced by something I was completely familiar with, he stammered and tugged roughly at his hair as his cheeks now took on a crimson red color. It was just too cute, I was tempted to let him keep going, never having an opportunity to be on this side things normally. But I couldn't, he seemed on the verge of bolting from the bar when I smiled, placing my hand gently on his arm, a bold move for me. "No, its okay. I'm not offended. To tell you the truth I was barely listening."

He looked down, his lovely features creasing into a frown "Oh…" _You're an idiot Bella Swan. _"No! Not that I wasn't listening to _you_…I was distracted. You're lips are…" _WHAT! Just shut up, shut up now! _His eyes went wide and he laughed, that electric voltage thing was not exclusive to his smile. Absently he touched his lips and laugh through his words "Oh. I…don't…really know what to say to that." Shaking my head I started up the stairs to the stage again "No please…don't say anything. Just…forget I said that last part. Or, forget pretty much everything I've said so far?" I looked pass him at Angela, Jake and now Leah, the looks on their faces confirmed that I was making a complete and utter clown of myself.

My eyes pleaded with him which apparently was incredibly funny, folding his arms across his chest he pulled is bottom lip into his mouth, lifting his eye brows watching as I climbed onto the stool, setting my guitar case on my lap "I, don't think that's possible Bella Swan." There wasn't anything I could say, nothing that would make me feel like less of a moron so I did what I do best, I closed my eyes, drowning out every thought, every sound around me. My hands made quick work of the latches on my guitar case and when I opened my eyes again the smooth curve of my guitar was cradled in my lap. My hand eased up the neck, taking in the coarse surface of each string and I smiled, this is what I needed, everything seems to come into perspective.

Smiling again as I tapped the microphone, the sound catching everyone's attention. The room barely visible in the low light, but I could hear a few people called my name, regulars who were familiar with my music. _My music_, for the most part it was the only thing keeping me sane most days and as I strummed my guitar making sure I was in tune, everything but the melodies that gave my soul reason to dance melted away. I was a different person up here, I wasn't shy, I was always so sure, each note I sang giving me confidence to go on to the next. I loved this version of myself and as my fingers began to pluck the strings I closed my eyes, the words conjured up by the notes drifting into place in the darkness and I sang, my body humming in chorus.

_Oh doubt in the girl by your side  
She's feeding your pride  
As you go for a ride down the star mile_

_Worlds arise as she lets you come in  
A duo begins  
To the Hollywood din of lonely_

A small smile pulled my lips up as the music, my music swelled around me spurring my voice to soar higher, the gentle melody of the chorus catching the corners of the room and I was sure everyone could hear me. I always knew, it was as if the room vibrated its appreciation of my attention to detail and I wanted every inch of this place to take me in, to come along for the ride.

_And all the gold dust in her eyes won't reform into rain  
You had and lost the one thing  
You kept in a safe place  
Remember the face  
Of the girl who made you her own  
And how you left her alone_

My body rocked and swayed as I went into the next verse, opening my eyes for the first time since I began, he was there, standing at the edge of the stage his face glowed with the low light as if the warm orange colors reached and bent for him, making his hair and eyes shimmer against the blackness of the room. I smiled at him, graceful; making the next line and notes of the song his if he wanted them. And he did, I watched as he hugged himself closer, returning my smile as he took in a deep breath. _I know…_is all I thought.

_Life comes to those that are true  
The regular news  
Over playing the blues with the light on_

And if you burn the road that'll lead you back to her in time  
I'll watch you turn to stone  
Can't find the sublime

She's moving on without you  
The tide breaks  
You watch the stars fade  
They gather you back to their home  
I guess it's better than being alone

Without realizing it, my eyes drifted closed again as I sang the last lines, my fingers continued to search effortlessly for each note leading to the end of my blissful moment in the spotlight. I felt it coming, the burn that began at the corners of my eyes and surged down into my throat, everything throbbing signaling the time I always knew was coming, but was never ready for…the end of my song. And as the last bar lifted into the air slowly, then disappeared I sighed into the microphone, opening my eyes only to be met with his. He didn't speak, there was no voltage smile or laughter, he just watched me, with an expression I didn't quite understand. I quietly spoke a thank you into the microphone as I got up, clutching my guitar to my chest as the applause continued to fill the room.

I was blushing and giggled a little as I kneeled down putting my instrument away and carrying the case off the stage, where he was waiting for me. Before I had time to say anything, before Angela, Jake or anyone could approach me about the song, he took my arm, pulling me closer to him with a familiarity that just felt right. I leaned in, looking up at him remnants of the better version of me still keeping that _other_ Bella at bay. I opened my mouth to let her say something clever, something that could make him feel what I felt each time I was in his presence but he beat me to clever, he beat me to floored and speechless.

"You're beautiful."

It was a statement. A fact, the words were uttered with such confidence in how correct they were that I couldn't argue; there wasn't any room for it. The real me twirled around, beating that other Bella further into the recesses of my psychotic psyche and grinned moving closer to him. She didn't slink away when he reached forward gently touching her cheek, she didn't fidget as he leaned in closer resting his forehead against hers, his breath mingling with her own as he spoke again "You. Are. Beautiful Bella Swan." Closer, she needed more and oddly enough that other Bella did too, she tilted her chin up brushing her lips over his and it was his turn to stutter, to be unsure of what to say or do with his hands. But she would help, she knew what each tremble of his breath and lips were saying to her and she pressed forward, satisfying them with a kiss.

Her hand cradling the firm line of his jaw as she captured his lower lip luring it into her mouth, her tongue slowly traced the supple flesh then dragging her teeth over the tender surface she moaned giving the kiss more depth. His groan was magnetic and it pulled her arm around his shoulder her fingers slipping into his hair a subtle whimper drifting into his mouth as she offered him more, her tongue curling around his once his lips parted giving her better access to him. He groaned again, louder as he took her waist his fingers wide and hesitant, toying with the idea of moving lower, she arched her back in invitation of whatever his hands wanted. He accepted, taking the kiss in another direction as his hand…

"Um Bella?"

…went further and she changed the direction the kiss the tip of her tongue following the joyous line of his lower lip, playfully flicking the corner as she pulled away for a brief moment only to dive back in.

"BELLA!" _Hmm?_

He growled low in his throat, she could feel the sound echo through her body as raked her teeth over his chin, her tongue finding the rough line of his neck and sucking there, the drum of his pulse rhythmic against her tongue, her soul lunged toward him when he growled again, the sound peppered with a profane word she didn't understand nor cared about.

Then it was over. Nothing. It was as if her body had been snatched from heaven and thrown into the fiery pits of hell. Only she was cold. _Noooooooo!_

That other Bella, cried out too, but it was too late. My chest rose and fell with each heated breath, every nerve at attention as I watched him my eyes wild and confused and he didn't look much different.

I knew who was holding me and I hated and loved him for it, someone was holding Edward as well. Tall, large he had an infectious grin that would have normally worked on me had I not been, in this moment, inoculated to everything that was not Edwards mouth, his hands on me and her. He laughed as he patted Edwards shoulder, tugging him back; he was still putting up a fight. _Yes, fight for me! _I on the hand was not, I wanted him, but was too embarrassed, too confused by my own abandon to make a move.

Raking my hand through my hair I looked over my shoulder, speaking softly to Jacob.

"I'm okay…" He hesitated before letting me go, never leaving my side just in case my calm was a trick. I was anything but calm, I felt that stinging in my eyes again and knew I was about to cry, my voice trembled as I spoke.

"I have to go." And I did. I ran, out of the bar, onto the street and just kept going.


	4. Chapter 4

**I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. Imagination is a wonderful thing this is a real test of mine. For anyone reading. Sorry about the long time between updates, I needed some motivation.**

**As always please review. I'm doing some serious pouting here. Lol.**

Chapter Four:

I could hear them, someone was following me, calling my name but I couldn't stop. My lungs constricted with my clumsy efforts to run as far and as fast as I could. My thoughts schizophrenically scattered and random _lips, breath, warm, beautiful, desire. _I looked over my shoulder when the sounds of running frantic voices faded and I sighed, finally allowing myself to slow down enough for the meltdown my body needed.

My thighs and calves ached as they slammed heavily into the pavement the shockwaves of my graceless steps forcing me to a halted stop. I threw my head back, a shattered sob leaped from my throat, loud unrestrained and I didn't care. It was all just too much, even as my lips throbbed and swelled as they stretched to release another guttural sound I could feel him. The rough piercing heat of his stubble on my mouth and chin, the subtle taste of cigarettes and coffee staining my lips, my tongue, my soul snatched another sob from me.

A couple rounding the corner held onto each other, their eyes trained on me as I backed against the brick wall of a storefront and slide to the ground. They slowed and I covered my mouth, shaking my head as their concerned eyes moved closer, the woman kneeling slightly to get a better look. _Fuck, no. _That other Bella clenched her fists, my fists and shook her head. Unnoticed the woman leaned in, her lips parting as she reached for me, now quivering with unknown, unfamiliar emotions.

_WHAT!? _She said and I heard it, the woman did too because the shock registered all over her face as my voice echoed down the empty street, bouncing and returning to me. I didn't recognize it, like waking from a dream. Everything around you is familiar, but not.

But she was right, I didn't want them here. I didn't want their concern or their sympathy. I didn't want to be asked if I needed help, clearly I did, but that was beside the point. I didn't want anything. My car maybe. A visual of my car snuggled against the curb, my guitar tossed against the stage, Angela waiting for me in front of the bar, Jacob, Leah, big giggling guy….Edward. _Fuck…NO! _ I kicked my foot out my tantrum already ebbing through me forcing my still clenched fists to slam against the concrete below. Gasps and words of protests and anger filled the street as the couple walked/ran away from me, the sound of their retreating footsteps serving to calm me some, but not enough. The meltdown had begun and I wasn't sure when it would end.

My eyes burned as I made my way up the stairs, my body barely responding making me have to concentrate on simple things like lifting my foot from one step to the next. I reached for my keys, trying to dig them from my pocket my finger tips so cold and numb I didn't notice immediately the familiar bulge of my keychain was not there. The slow registration of several facts began to dawn on me.

I have no car.

I have no guitar.

I have no keys.

I have no brain.

I was exhausted, defeated and just… I don't know…whatever. Resting my forehead against the glass of my apartment building I'd resigned myself to stay right there. It was practically daylight anyway and I'd reasoned that my body wouldn't make it to the fifth floor anyway. This was good, it was, providence, from Gods sick, twisted sense of humor to my pathetic, disjointed, completely fucktastic life. With a nod and a tug to my shirt sleeves I slide my arms in close to my body as I sat with a resounding thud on the threshold step, closing my eyes. I needed to sleep.

_**Buuuuzzzzzzzzzz.**_

_Mmmmm….no._

_**Buuuuuzzzzzzzzzzz!**_

_Hrmph…no. Too cold. GO AWAY!_

Silence.

Sigh.

Snuggle.

_**Buuuuuuzzzzzzzzz! Buuuuuzzzz! Buzzzz! Buzz! Buzz! Buuuuuuzzzzzzzzzzz!**_

_Forfucksake! WHAT!_

"Beylah?"

I could feel my face scrunch, whiny, groany sounds of complaint and full on freak out for having to get out of bed for whoever the hell this was already falling from my too tired, too cold, neck hurting, back throbbing self. _And why was it so cold anyway; fucking radiator again? Shit, I hate this building_. Stretching my arm out from underneath the covers. _Tight, oh, put my arms in my shirt again…s'kay. Cold. _

Stretching, not quite ready to open my eyes as I rub my hands up and down my arms a visible shiver traveling through my body as I move leaning against my headboard to stretch my neck to one side and then the other. The walls, my headboard giving way somehow behind me, I screech my eyes flashing open just as my head hits the hard tiled floor, brilliant sparkling lights scatter and dance in my eyes as the light dims and the pain surrounds me.

"Ooooowwww. Wha…"

"Beylah? Why you ouit herr? Yowah drink?" The tisking and tongue clicking sound of my landlady Mrs. Velazquez obvious disapproval of my hobo-self littering the front of her building set in motion the flashbacks of my torturous night. I groaned closing my eyes and raking my hand over my face as I sat up.

"Drink? I mean…drunk?" I sighed looking up at her as I rubbed the back of my head the lump in my throat returning.

"No…not drunk." _You wish. _Making it somehow to my feet letting out a breath as she slowly came into focus her eyes scanning me warily. "I don't have my key Mrs. Velazquez. Can you…."

Thankfully recognition of what I needed flashed across her face and she threw up a finger after nodding her head as she held the door open, her plump floral covered hiney swayed with the constant grace of the ocean as she lead me to her first floor apartment, the smell of spices and candles filled my senses making my stomach growl once she opened the door. Speaking in Spanish she called her husband Benjamin, loud and I tried really hard not to groan. The look she gave me over her shoulder told me I failed, giving her an apologetic smile I rubbed my head some more Mr. Velazquez coming into view a half eaten slice of toast in his mouth.

They spoke quietly to each other, both staring at me, and then he disappeared around the corner briefly, returning with a large wad of keys offering me a sad smile.

"Come, I let you in."

"Thank you." I said, smiling at both him before he headed for the door and his wife, her arms crossed over her chest still watching me.

I didn't care. I knew I looked like some strung out crack whore in my dirty wet jeans, red eyes and god knows what my hair looked like. Didn't matter, I just needed a shower, a bed and a memory extractor. That's real right? Didn't someone invent that…or was that a movie? Fuck if I know.

I never bothered to answer the phone. In fact I unplugged it. If someone knocked I didn't hear it and as I let the scorching hot water run over my head and down my body the memory of the night before began to take a more hopeful shape in my mind. _This isn't so bad. So what, you kissed a guy. He kissed you back, its not like you were molesting him with your tongue and someone called the cops. This is not a big deal Bella._

"I know…its okay." Wrapping the towel around my body as I cleared a circle in the foggy mirror taking a look at my eyes, smiling a bit, grateful for the twelve or so hours of uninterrupted sleep. _This is fine. You'll go to work, claim temporary insanity or overactive clitorial issues and…that's it. Life goes on. _

"Probably never see him again." _Really?_

I sighed pulling my hair into a loose ponytail looking myself over before slinging my bag over my shoulder checking the clock before leaving. Locking my door and bounding down the stairs slipping the loaner key Mr. Velazquez gave me under their mat before heading out. I smiled as the cool air filled my lungs then headed down the block. I was walking to work and was pretty okay with it.

If my car wasn't towed it would be in front of Deluca's tonight and I would just get a ride over there when my shift was over. _No big deal. We're very grown up today Bella. I'm proud of us. _Chuckling a little at that I nodded "Me too." I mumbled as I tugged my Ipod from my bag slipping the ear buds in smiling more as my favorite playlist rang in my ears.

_Perfect soundtrack for today. _

My body swayed to the melodic sound of Bob Marley, mouthing the words I felt myself skip and dance down the street. My arms raised over my head as I waited for the light to change, other Bella sang loud making me grin.

_Stir it up; little darlin', stir it up. Come on, baby.  
Come on and stir it up: little darlin', stir it up. O-oh!_

_It's been a long, long time, yeah!  
(stir it, stir it, stir it together)  
Since I got you on my mind. (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh) Oh-oh!  
Now you are here (stir it, stir it, stir it together), I said,  
it's so clear  
There's so much we could do, baby, (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)  
Just me and you._

Come on and stir it up; ..., little darlin'!  
Stir it up; come on, baby!  
Come on and stir it up, yeah!  
Little darlin', stir it up! O-oh!

I dance/walked across the street, my shoulders and hips shimmying in time to the music, my bottom lip curling into my mouth as a favorite part approached and I sang aloud.

I'll push the wood (stir it, stir it, stir it together),  
then I blaze ya fire;  
Then I'll satisfy your heart's desire. (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)  
Said, I stir it every (stir it, stir it, stir it together),  
every minute:  
All you got to do, baby, (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)  
Is keep it in, eh!

(Stir it up) Oh, little darlin',  
Stir it up; ..., baby!  
Come on and stir it up, oh-oh-oh!  
Little darlin', stir it up! Wo-oh! Mm, now, now.

As the song drifted to the end I realized I was just a mere half block away from the diner and released a slow breath, nodding to myself.

"I can do this. I bet noone even cares about me kissing some random guy." _Exactly. You'll be fine._

Smiling again tugging the ear buds from my ear and stuffing them back in my bag as I began to pull the door to the diner open. The familiar jingle of the entry chime sounded and I stepped in sliding my bag from my shoulder my eyes immediately falling on Angela who was leaning against the counter handing Billy ticket. She looked over and her face said what I was sure she was about to say.

"Oh. My. God."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

"Angela…just. Don't." _Well there goes that mellow Bob Marley mood huh. _I rushed past her raking my hand through my hair knowing full well she was following me. Making my way past Billy who tapped his watch with the spatula he was brandishing I rolled my eyes, all remnants of my good mood now circling the proverbial drain.

"What the fuck happened to you last night Bella…Bella!" Groaning I moved as quickly as I could past the empty french fry and hamburger pattie boxes slipping into the bathroom. Angela right on my heels her face and voice so amused my arms and hands twitched to throw something at her. She wasn't going to give up.

"You know this bathroom is made for one person. See…one toilet. One sink." I hated sarcastic Bella, she was my least favorite version of me.

"Bella, you have to talk to me." She crossed her arms over her chest leaning on the sink making the already cramped dingy space nearly claustrophobic. Staring at me expectantly she was completely unphased by my bad mood her best friend shield easily deflecting all the daggers my eyes were throwing her. So I did the only thing I know how to do, I pretended I didn't know what she was talking about.

"I…don't know what you're talking about." Shrug, yes, that's the best I've got. As I redid my already done ponytail and risked a glance at her from the corner of my eye, she wasn't buying it and I knew there was no point in continuing the charade because. Well, she has way more energy than I do for these kinds of things. So I gave up and all the fear, frustration, shame and sheer anger at myself came spilling out all at one.

"Fuck, Angela what is wrong with me?" She knew I didn't expect an answer because she moved behind me and fished my brush from my bag, silently starting to brushing my hair a small empathetic smile curling her lips. Let the tirade begin.

"I…I don't even know what to say. It's like…I was possessed or something. Just, one minute I was singing, you that song, the song I was working on last week. I loved that song you know?" She nodded sifting the brush once more through my hair her kind eyes telling my reflection she understood.

"And then the next I just….I was all over him. He, he was all over me. Goooood Ang I swear, it was like we were…you know. Those things, the black or sometimes they're grey things that like…have a positive and a negative side and they push….and they pull….and they stick…you know, together? Like…they have letters you know? Fluorescent ones…and sometimes they have fruit. Like grapes and strawberries. I use to break them apart when I was little so I could take them out. One time I swallowed a bunch because I saw that movie Powder and wanted stuff to stick to me. You know…and they're for grocery lists. Like when you run out of milk you….God I loved that movie."

"Magnets honey."

"No Powder….Oh! Right, yeah…we were like magnets just crashing into each other and kissing and touching. It was…." I shook my head, fully aware of how insane I sound but, this was Angela and if there was anyone I could be insane with, it was her. No one I'd rather in fact.

"It was, the most amazing thing I've ever experience…in my life Ang. I mean, I've never felt someone pull me, the way he was able to." Sighing I shook my head, turning to her my confusion of the last 24 hours replaying for her over my face.

"It was like he just reached right into me and I reached into him. I couldn't help myself and I…I don't know. I don't think he could either Ang. I mean…it felt…mutual. Like it was beyond both of us."

She smiled. That thoughtful, 'Oh poor Bella' smile that I most of the time despised, but, this time totally needed.

"Am I crazy Ang? I mean…seriously. Did I attack some guy last night and take off running? I mean, a part of me believes I've committed some serious borderline mouth…raping..thing here."

Blank stare, on both our parts. Then not so much to my surprise she threw her head back laughing hysterically, which made me laugh, finally truly feeling better about this whole thing for the first time. Moving past her to open the bathroom door, I ducked as a greasy metal spatula was paused to crack against it.

"I swear if the two of you don't get your asses out here…."

"You'll what?" I ducked under Harry's arm as he and Angela began their face off, quickly snatching my apron from its nail on the wall, tying it around my waist.

Several obscenities and 'talk to the hands' later we, all three of us returned to the diner storefront the room buzzing with clinking forks and murmured conversation. Harry hit the bell on the order window as Angela passed just to annoy her, pointing his spatula at her in warning when she threw him a middle finger with each ding.

I made my rounds, smiling absently at the customers at my tables, my mind was wandering already and I knew this was going to be a long night. Table three wanted a refill on their drinks, table five was nearly done and asked for their check. I went behind the counter to look for it near the register, searching through the carbon order pad.

"Hey Ang, did you take table fives order? I don't see a carbon here."

Her hands were full as she lifted two plates from the order winder still playfully annoying Billy "Yeah honey, it in the drawer, right under the register."

"I don't….see it." I mumbled that last part leaning down to search further under the counter for the pad. I threw up a hand in greeting as the door chimed again, signaling another customer.

.

"Welcome to Grey Wolf, how many?"

"Um…hi."

Now, this is one of those moments. One of those moments when you already know how things are going to play out, that psychic DNA kicking into high gear and flooding your system letting the next few moments reel across your mind like a thirty second trailer to your life. My stomach flipped then swirled, then twitched and I didn't want to resurface. I knew he was there. Two simple, almost words, that's all I needed to tell me that the person I was dreading the most was standing just a mere three feet away.

I hadn't decided what I was going to do, my eyes closed as I weighed my options my body tingled, every nerve dancing and stretching toward him. I was already on my knees, crawling the length of the diner to the back and making my way out the storeroom door seemed pretty plausible.

Another ding…then another. Fucking dinner rush.

"Hey, she here? Because I'm friggin starving man."

Silence and I knew they were saying something because the hungry guy said

"Oh…"

I sighed, holding my hand against my stomach in a meager attempt to keep it under control I slowly stood back up my eyes wandering the room then finally taking in the three men standing silently in front of me. I cleared my throat, my ears burning and I knew without bothering to touch them that they were red, giving away how completely mortified I was at the moment.

Three pairs of eyes stared back at me, two were completely amused, both glancing between each other, their huge unabashed grins making the blues of their iris' sparkle with some unsaid playful thing. The third just watch me, or at least I think they did because I only chance a glimpse into them before stumbling through the rest of this moment, staying true to the trailer.

"Wel…welcome to…I mean…table for three then?" _Well helllloooooo._

He didn't answer, his friend the large guy from last night gave me a knowing yet sweet smile clapping him on the shoulders as he spoke, his voice full of laughter.

"Yes…Bella. That's exactly what we need. A table for three. Got any?"

Groan, I knew pretending last night didn't happen was out of the question, but, big guy using my name just made it all the more a reality. _Okay Bella…you can do this. _I nodded to both myself and them as I made my way back around the counter on unsteady legs. I looked for Angela who was grinning from ear to ear, waving a hand at me clearly letting me know she had the rest of my tables so I cold just deal with, whatever this was.

I started to walk and they all fell in behind me, the hairs at the back of my neck prickled letting me know he was closest to me. The knowledge of that making my knees weak and I feared I would stumble so I stopped gesturing toward the counter seats, clearing my throat again to make sure I could actually speak. I turned and he was inches from me an embarrassed crooked smile changing his expression from somber to hopeful. My breath catching in my throat as he watched me, inches from my face, he didn't move back, in fact he leaned in closer and I stumbled slightly, swallowing the lump swelling in my throat again.

"Or you could…the counter is pretty much…open. There's…I mean, I could take your order from…here."

The big guy grinned and smacked his hand loud on the marble surface making Edward jump. "Hell yeah…authentic diner experience. That's what I'm lookin for babe." He flashed me a pointed grin making the slimmer, shaggy haired blonde guy chuckle as he climbed onto a stool leaning back quietly watching the two of us.

Edward rolled his eyes, briefly taking them away from me to sigh at his friends, shaking his head.

"Em, just…sit down. Please."

I swear I could hear angels singing at the sound of his voice. Even simple phrases sounded lyrical as they poured from that beautiful mouth.

"Bella, I'm sorry…I just, I needed to see you and…they were…hungry." He laughed and my heart leapt.

"No, I'm starving. Its been like…thirty minutes since I've eaten anything. Hungry, just doesn't cut it dude." Big guy chimed in again.

That made me laugh and Edward seemed to enjoy it as much as I did his, he raked a hand through his hair and released a long slow breath letting his hand trail to the back of his neck where it stayed.

"No, its okay. Um, have a seat…let me get you some menus.

He slide onto a bar stool, his friend hopped up and gave the stool a twirl making the two men flanking him roll their eyes and shake their heads. I handed out menus, first to the guy on the end. He took the menu offering me a small yet friendly smile, I returned it nervously tucking a stray hair behind my ear. I grinned more as I gave Em his menu he took it with a playful snatch his eyes twinkling mischievously his lips twisting as he looked over the specials. And last, Edward. I slide the menu to him as I moved in front of him from my side of the counter. He took it never letting his eyes leave mine.

"Bella can we…I, can I talk to you? I mean…do you get a break…or something. Can I just…I know you don't know me. But, last night…you have to know last night I…I've never…I mean, did you feel what…"

"What my dear…tongue tied and stupid brother is trying to tell you miss Bella is…he would like a moment of your time today."

I laughed inwardly as Edward closed his eyes, his brother, big guy Em clapped his hands on his shoulders again and spoke for him. And he wasn't done.

"So he could stick his tongue down your throat again."

_Hrm? Yes Please._

"He's been pacing the floor all night and I swear to God if you don't let him kiss you again I might have to break his fucking legs."

"Emmett! Jesus man." The blonde guy smacked the back of his head and he never wavered. His eyes continued to sparkle with amusement as his brother raked a hand over his face apparently too embarrassed to look at me now.

And me? I wanted to be anywhere but right here at this moment.

"Yes. She has a break coming up…right now in fact."

Angela sauntered over nudging me with her hip forcing me out of my coma.

"Bella…you can go ahead and take your break first."

My cheeks began to burn, I looked at her pleading with my eyes.

"No, I just got here Angela. Why don't you go."

She shrugged, retying her apron giving me a 'Don't even try it look'.

"Nope, I'm good. Go ahead. I'll attend to these two trouble makers." She laughed swatting the counter in front of Emmett who just ate the attention up.

He looked at me now, his eyes practically begging me to give him a chance and I was instantly swimming in murky pools of emerald and sunlight. _Christ, this is not going to turn out well…_

He smiled softly getting up from his stool and I placed a finger over my lips silently hoping I didn't say that out loud. I untied my apron and draped it over the counter as I met him on the other side. He gestured for me to allow him to follow and when I walked toward the door he did just that. My body surged with this…indescribable…thing as he closed the short distance, reaching around me to open the door, the chime sounding again and I cursed it as I stepped outside walking slowly down the block.

We were quiet for a long time. Every time I thought to say something I would find a reason why I should just…shut up. I didn't know what needed to be said, so for now, the silence felt right.

Finally as we made our way down the fourth block, he touched my arm the warmth of his fingers blazed up my arm and continued to ebb slowly; every part of me reacting to him.

"Bella, I've never done anything like that before. Ever."

"No, me…me either."

"You have to know, I'm not some stalker or crazy person. I swear when I saw you at that bar last night, it was a total surprise. Jasper heard the music, saw the sign that said open mic and thought I should go in, see if I could get on for a bit. That's all."

_Awww, he's so cute when he rambles._

"And then you came in and I was so glad to see you. I mean, I thought we had a connection earlier that day. You know…I felt it. You see shit like that in movies all the time right? It was our meet-cute. Our Humphrey Bogart/Lauren Bacall moment right?"

_Ohmigod…kiss him._

"And then I felt like an idiot because, you just sounded so beautiful. It was like you were singing to me and I got caught up. I don't know what happened, I've been trying to figure it out all fucking night Bella, but…I can't. All I know is, I needed to kiss you, I needed to just…take your mouth and…just…"

His lips press together in a hard straight line as he visibly struggled to hold back what I knew was something too raw, too much to say out loud. I knew because I was completing his sentences in my head. _See, you're not crazy. No mouth raping._

_No…no mouth raping._

I laughed as his eyebrows knitted together, I already knew that was said out loud and I didn't care. I was going crazy and that didn't matter either. Moving closer to him, she was back. Brave Bella, crazy Bella, unashamed and uninhibited Bella slipped her arms over his shoulders. An easy sultry grin lighting up her face making him instantly melt against her, his hands toying with the ends of her hair.

"Stop talking."


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Yaaay! I finally got some reviews. Thank you so much Daddyzwillgurl and Fan of Fiction 247, you have no idea how happy seeing those reviews today made me. I know its totally goofy, but…I lurve them. Okay, this chapter is well, smut filled. I'm going somewhere with their relationship, it needs to start this way so just bare with it. If I offend, I can't really apologize, I'm writing what they need me to, so yeah. Hope I don't lose any of you. Okie doke, thanks again and as always, please review it makes me happy and less idiotic about writing.

Enjoy.

Chapter Six:

_You're such a slut…I'm so proud of us._

I groaned as my lips skimmed along the swell of his adams apple as it trembled beneath the thin warm skin of his neck. Drawing a wet line around it with the tip of my tongue before dipping into the hollow well at the base of his neck, I growled low in my throat "Shut. Up." He laughed amid a long moan his body shuddering as he pushed me backward, my mind slowly registering the alleyway as we were eclipsed by the shadows between the buildings.

"Believe me…" his long fingers eased there way down my back rounding my curves lifting and squeezing, rocking my body closer to him. "…I'm done talking." He pushed me tight against the building his leg slipping between mine our bodies carrying on a conversation of their own the language was simple, every inch of us growled Fuck. Me.

And as he pressed his obvious need for me against my thigh and hissed as I pushed up against him, I was more than ready to oblige. Feeling the bulge twitch as I slipped my hand under his t-shirt I was breathless, sensible Bella rearing her ugly, stupid, goodie two shoe head, full of doubt. She was acutely aware of the cars passing on the street, the clicking of heels and the shuffle of sneakers on the concrete sidewalk, the dog at the other end of the alley chasing something he was really close to catching.

"No…not you." _Fuck you. Go away! _

"What? I don't care." He pull back snatching her body around so she faced the wall now, his words breathless in her ear as he plucked the button on her jeans loose, sighing as his hand slipped hot and anxious inside, bypassing her panties. His hands were confident, fingers sure of themselves as they trailed through the brisk triangle of hair to the soft, moist apex they sought. He sighed and relaxed against her, his cock nestling in the natural valley of her rear, pulsing as he rolled his hips over and over each time beating that Bella further away. He was all around her, his mouth on her neck, his finger dancing a torturous circle around her now wet hard clit, then moving on allowing his fingers to explore further, slipping down parting her warm nether lips.

"Oh God…yes." She was gone. The favorite of us twirling her way to the surface, taking over with a quick thrust into his hand, blissfully adding to the friction.

"Shit, you're so wet." His tongue flicked the top of my ear, following the curve to the lobe, sucking it in; earring and all. My mouth fell open as did my legs, my mind, my heart, my spirit. Every part of me was seeking him out in whatever way he offered, body trembling all over at his next words and his gloriously skilled fingers now coaxing my clit harder until it jerked in ravenous anticipation of each swipe.

"I can smell you…how wet you are. I'm drunk with it…like a drug. Please."

I didn't know who I was any more; the words drifting in the blackness of my closed eyes then falling from my mouth were foreign to me. Alien. But as he pulled me back, the rough sound of zippers parting and clothes ruffling as they were pulled and tugged away I'd never felt more…true.

I looked over my shoulder, my fingers reaching back tangling into the mess of greasy tossled hair, needing him even closer. I whispered, my lips chapped from my dry eager breaths as my jeans pooled at my knees, his bare lower body pressed tight against me, grinding in slow motion seeking solace until I granted him permission.

"Do it…now." I arched my back, begging with my body, his hardness finding its way against my folds as he crushed his mouth to mine, his tongue immediately seeking entrance simultaneous with the tip of his cock.

Our voices sang out in chorus as he rushed inside, burying his full length to my core, filling me so completely tears welled in my eyes at the sheer euphoria of it. I pressed my hands flat against the brick wall, my knees scraped as he began a frantic, tantric rhythm, everything about him screamed out of control. And I loved it. I wanted it. I needed the pure insanity of his thrusts, the decompensation of his thoughts and psychotic declarations of ecstasy as he pound into me at an unrelenting pace.

"Fuck, Bella…Oh God." He growled to me, his teeth clamping down on my ear sending a surge of erotic pleasure through my body, pooling where he joined me in heaven. I sang out now, my head dropping lower, the impulse to lean down taking him deeper inside so strong that my body just followed, I held on for the ride. I felt him stumble backward gripping my hips more to steady himself never breaking the pace of his thrusts.

Somewhere in the recesses of my mind I heard myself rasp words like faster, harder, deeper. I didn't know who this was, she was so sure of herself, so determined to come that all versions of me resolved to get acquainted with this new me once we regained some semblance of control. Right now, we were happy to relent. Bella was getting off and we all celebrated as our body quaked and shimmered with this sexy sweat that rolled slowly down our back. Everything seemed to meet in the middle, where he swelled now inside me begging me in low ragged breaths to explode with him.

And I did. I exploded with a recklessness my body has never known, my voice echoing down the alley, spilling out onto the street. I felt him cover my mouth, quiet encouragement to shush between kisses and low barely reserved groans of his own. My heart drummed against my rib cage, my pulse percussed just beneath the surface of my skin, every vein gluttoned with a rush of blood, filled to brimming. So sated and sluggish I collapsed against the brick, my legs trembling with threat to throw me to the ground.

I felt him hold me close; lazy open mouthed kisses mapped a warm pattern along the side of my neck before he began to dress us both. I was useless.

Resting against the building we both smiled, then giggled and kissed softly, our tantrum over now, what was left was…sweet. Nice, shy…new. His fingers laced with mine, still warm and slightly moist from being inside me and he tugged me a bit leading me from the alley pressing a kiss to my temple as we strolled back toward the diner in complete silence. Words weren't necessary, I knew exactly what he wanted to say my soul was already in deep conversation with his, evidenced only by the tender smiles we both wore as we reached the diner again his arm moving gently around my waist holding me still before heading inside.

"I wanna see you tonight. Can you…will you meet me somewhere?"

"Anywhere." We didn't know who she was, but we really liked this Bella, we were truly considering allowing her permanent residence. He laughed and my heart actually did a jig, rejoicing in the sound of huskiness, knowing in a smug, possessive way that I put it there. He ran his fingers through his hair as he considered in silence for a brief moment, then kissed my lips gently, rubbing back and forth as if we had all the time in the universe to just stay here, kissing in front of the world.

"I don't know where to go. What time do you get off?" That made me grin wide and touch his face, my nails marveling at the dark stubble shadowing his strong jaw; he leaned into my touch, kissing me again. Nuzzling closer parting my lips with his own my tongue meeting his in a brief dance before retreating into warm separation. I bit my lip at the absence and so did he, waiting for my answer.

"One o'clock in the morning. Too late?" He chuckled at the absurdity of that question, shaking his head.

"No, I'll be here." We both grinned at that as he reached behind me opening the door, the bell chiming, Angela, Emmett and the quiet guy watching us with arched brows and smirks that made us both blush and fidget as we held onto the others hand.

"Ummm, so…I'll see you tonight then Bella." He cleared his throat trying to sound casual, the crooked smile he was failing to hide made the threesome roll their eyes and continue to stare.

"Right…one o'clock. I look forward to _talking _to you again Edward."

There was a snort, then a groan we both watched as Emmett held his hand out a shit eating grin on his face as both Angela and quiet guy slapped a bill into his hand making him cackle and shove the bills into his pocket. He pushed away from the counter clapping Edward on the shoulders giving me a wink.

"Dinner's on me tonight." He laughed, heading out, quiet guy shaking his head as he passed us wearing a disappointed smirk that grew into a slow smile as he followed Emmett. Angela laughed to herself as she tugged her apron from around her waist tossing it over the counter pointing at me.

"You owe me twenty dollars girlie." She called toward Harry that she was going for her break still shaking her head as she disappeared into the back.

We both stared at each other for a moment then dissolved into laughter; he squeezed my fingers pulling them to his lips to kiss each softly before letting go.

"I'll be here…one o'clock." He walked backward toward the door a clumsy, lazy look softening his already beautiful features. His voice was low and raspy a direct result of his growls and husky moans just moments ago.

"No, I'll be here at…twelve fifty-nine. Fifty-eight….no…twelve fifty-seven."

I watched him, laughing at every word, my body tingling with need to fuck it all and just follow him anywhere. But sensible Bella was making her way to the surface again and the rest of us pouted just a bit, comforted only by the fact that this new Bella wasn't receding to the background just yet. She moved over, allowing the other to stand beside her. They would do this together. Enjoy this for all of us.

He moved quickly toward me again, offering a sweet kiss with those deliciously full lips then backed away, chuckling at his need to take just a little more.

"Something to carry me over the next few hours."

I laughed my eyes thankful for his being able to act on his impulses where I could not. I jumped as Harry hit the bell with his spatula calling my name with threats of joblessness and lack of bathroom breaks. He rolled his eyes, kissing me again then jutting a chin toward Harry before making up his mind to leave finally, smirking at the blush coloring my cheeks.

I sighed happily as I watched him join his friends at their jeep, slipping inside the other two clearly buzzing with need of information. I watched him watch me, even as they pulled off he pressed his fingers to him lips and let a kiss drift through the air in my direction. It made my body brim with happiness and I secretly caught it and pressed it to my heart. Watching the jeep until I could no longer make it out in the distance, I didn't realize I'd gone to the window, didn't know I was leaning my forehead against it. Was barely aware that my foot had made its way out of my shoe and my toes were curling in languid joy against the cold tile floor, my fingers twirling the end of my ponytail.

"BELLA! GODDAMMIT LET'S GO!"

"Oh…sorry Harry."


End file.
